No fun: December is supposed to be a month of festivities but for many, it is a time when they are more than usually prone to depression.
Mental health conditions such as depression and anxiety can intensify during December, stemming from issues such as economic pressures, family dynamics and social expectations, but there are mechanisms to cope with this.
These feelings are normal at this time of the year, says clinical psychologist Chris Kemp.
“There are a lot of people out there struggling with feelings of loneliness or feelings of insecurity around this time, so if you are someone who feels this way, even though you feel alone, you aren’t alone.
“There are a lot of people feeling very similar to you,” Kemp said.
The festive season is associated with joy and festivities with loved ones, but for some, these societal expectations induce pressure and feelings of loneliness.
“The media and social expectations portray this time as one of celebration and connection, but for people who may be experiencing loneliness, unresolved grief or fractured family relationships, this stark contrast can heighten feelings of isolation and sadness,” said another clinical psychologist, Anele Siswana.
For those who have lost a loved one, the December period is a reminder of their loss and grief, according to Cassey Chambers, the operations director at the South African Depression and Anxiety Group (Sadag).
“It might be the first — or even fifth — Christmas after losing a loved one, or perhaps dealing with financial stress, so this holiday season is going to look very different than before,” Chambers said.
Sadag receives more calls from older people during December, many grappling with loneliness and depression because they don’t have children or family who visit.
On the other hand, visiting home and family could trigger unresolved trauma or suppressed emotions, Siswana said, adding that “black tax” — a reference to how many black people feel obligated to provide financial support to extended family members — can cause more pressure.
“It is seen as one of the socially constructed ideas driving mental health. There’s an undertone of unreasonable expectations and demands from family,” he said.
Year-end reflections can spark depression because “focusing on perceived failures, missed opportunities or unfinished goals can exacerbate feelings of hopelessness and anxiety”, Siswana added.
“Financial stress is one of the most significant contributors to mental health challenges during the festive season. The pressure to spend on gifts, travel and celebrations can become overwhelming.”
She said the reality of “January blues” — where financial strain spills into the new year — also weighs heavily on people’s minds.
Kemp said acknowledging these feelings, instead of suppressing them, is the first step to lessening the load.
“When we talk about depression or feeling low, obviously we always want people to sit with their feelings. We want people to be able to acknowledge their feelings; we don’t want them to force them aside.”
People should try the “opposite action” method — doing the opposite of what you feel like doing.
“Depression tends to drag us down and make us do things that hold us in that space.
“So, instead of staying in bed all day, or not seeing people or not interacting enough, simple things like getting up, getting dressed, getting out of bed or getting out of the house and going somewhere nice or doing something that sort of feeds your soul or that you enjoy.”
People should also embrace self-awareness and accept their feelings without judgment. They must set boundaries to protect their energy, finances and mental health and say “no” to draining activities and stick to a realistic budget, Siswana said.
It is also important to reflect on the past year and plan small, achievable changes for growth in the new year, emphasising progress over perfection, he added.
“It’s also important to understand that being human means navigating both light and shadow, joy and pain.
“Feeling overwhelmed during certain seasons or moments in life doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you; it means you’re alive, you’re processing, and that’s okay.
“Life brings challenges — whether it’s personal loss, family pressures, financial worries or feelings of loneliness — and your reaction to these experiences is real and unique to you.”
• Sadag counsellors offer support 24 hours a day, seven days a week
• Toll-free helpline: 0800 567 567 or 0800 456 789
• SMS counselling: Send a message to 31393 and a counsellor will call you back
• WhatsApp support: Send a message to 076 882 2775 (8am to 5pm) and chat live to a counsellor for free
• Visit www.sadag.org for more information.
